When I was asked to contribute a regular column for MailOnline, I promised myself never to write about Joey Barton, unless it was purely football related.
But I have to break that vow.
Recently his former QPR team-mate Shaun Derry came into the talkSPORT studios to join us on the show. He tried to convince me that Joey is actually intelligent.
Joey thought fighting everyone on the last day of last season, when QPR needed to win, was a good idea.
He’s the man who regularly uses abbreviated forms of the words spastic and mongoloid to insult people he has never even met on Twitter.
The man who said in an interview after arriving at Marseille: ‘The culture is a lot more in keeping with professional athletes. There’s a lot of fish in the diet and a lot of salad.’
Home and away: Barton raved about Marseille's healthy diet of fish and salads... but this Mister Kebab eaterie is not too far from where they play
Of course, you can’t get salad and fish in England, Joey. And by the same token if he heads down the Avenue de la Pointe Rouge in Marseille he will find a lovely little eaterie called Mister Kebab, in English, just so Joey can understand what it means.
There are other obvious examples from his past to underline his complete lack of intelligence.
It could be Joey’s football ability that got him the move to Marseille, or it could be an agent with astonishing contacts. Either way Barton has been given the honour of playing for Marseille in France.
So quite why he thinks it’s acceptable to call a wonderful defender like Thiago Silva a ‘ladyboy’ and talk about whether he is ‘pre-op’ or ‘post-op’ is anybody’s guess.
Crass tweets: Barton (below, left) ridiculed PSG defender Thiago Silva (below, right) on Twitter last weekThe fact that Thiago Silva plays for Paris Saint-Germain is something an intelligent person would have been aware of. Three years ago a PSG fan was left in a coma by Marseille fans and eventually died. Away fans were banned from the fixtures between the two. Before that, violence and arrests were common when teams from the two rival cities clashed.
Stoking up the hate with a personal attack on one of PSG’s leading players was wholly unintelligent. Joey’s repeated attempts to shake off the image of a brainless thug have all failed. If he sticks to football and shuts up he might stand a chance of earning some respect.
History of violence: Marseille man Barton's comments towards PSG defender Thiago Silva appeared to disregard the past of terrible hostilities between the two French rivalsMORE FROM ADRIAN DURHAMSunderland did not give Di Canio the job for football reasons. I find that hard to swallow... Jol had no answer to Redknapp's tactics... and why Carroll's goal was just as good as Ba'sBrazil used to be brilliant, but this side is far from special... Cleverley is not quite Scholes and not quite Carrick... selling Suarez will send Liverpool on the road to mediocrityI've done what Sven and Fabio couldn't and solved the great Lampard conundrum - play him as an out-and-out striker... Rio has let down the country's fans and Martinez must maul McManaman for horror tackleCLICK HERE TO VIEW THE FULL ARCHIVE
We should all stand up and applaud what Paul Lambert is trying to achieve at Aston Villa. He has a team made up mainly of young players – eight of the starting XI at Stoke on Saturday are 23 years old or under, and six of those eight are English.
If you haven’t seen Villa this season, that’s a shame because this is a team that tries to play football.
They keep the ball on the floor and pass it around. Unless it’s a clearance, they rarely hoof the ball aimlessly.
These young players have technique. Matthew Lowton scored one of the goals of the season with a beautiful chest and volley from 25 yards with Stoke’s hardest hatchet men charging at him.
They’re brave. Nathan Baker took the ball full in the face from a fierce Kenwyne Jones blast. And carried on no problem.
And they’ve got character. Jordan Bowery started only his second Premier League game for Villa in that big relegation clash at Stoke.
Scroll down to watch Matthew Lowton's wonder goal at Stoke Round of applause: Paul Lambert, despite Villa's struggles this season, deserves credit for what he is ultimately trying to achieve
All of these young players look calm and composed on the ball and, even better, they kept their heads up on Saturday. They had been by far the better side at Stoke, so when the home team equalised, heads might have dropped. But they didn’t and Villa hit back to win 3-1 with two late goals.
Heavy beatings at Chelsea and Man City have proved that it’s a project that has some way to go. Indeed, Aston Villa are still heavily involved in the relegation picture. Individual mistakes will happen with a young, growing team and those errors have cost Villa dear this season.
It would be a travesty if Villa were to go down, given the quality of the football they play. Aston Villa fans should feel proud of their club – it’s a model that every other club should try to emulate.
Wonder goal: Matthew Lowton scored a stunning strike to help Villa on their way to an important victory over Stoke at the weekend .epl_container,.epl_top_container, .spon_left, .spon_right, .epl_clear{display:block;margin:0px;padding:0px;min-height:0px;font-size:0px;border:0px;white-space:nowrap;} .epl_container{background-color:#000000;} .epl_top_container{background:#F9F9F9 url(http://l.yimg.com/i/i/uk/any/e/bkg.jpg) repeat-x scroll top;} .spon_left{width:140px;float:left;height:60px;overflow:hidden;background:#000000 url(http://l.yimg.com/i/i/uk/any/e/ylogo.jpg) no-repeat;} .spon_right{width:160px;float:right;height:60px;overflow:hidden;background:#000000 url(http://l.yimg.com/i/i/uk/any/e/right.jpg) no-repeat;} .epl_clear{clear:both;} WHY DO NORWICH AND STOKE PROFIT FROM DULL FOOTBALL?Norwich are playing for draws and Stoke are dreadful to watch. Two sides who let the Premier League down with their lack of quality. Fourteen times this season Stoke have failed to score. They leave decent players like Charlie Adam and Michael Kightly on the bench, and even when they need a goal they rarely throw Michael Owen on. It’s dreadful football and from what I heard on Saturday (when I was at the Britannia Stadium), the fans are beginning to turn against Pulis. Norwich, meanwhile, have had more goalless draws than any other team. With the odd exception, Norwich have been happy to settle for a point in games particularly in the second half of the season, hoping it will keep them safe. Look at Hughton’s substitutions in certain games – they haven’t even tried to win. My problem with Stoke and Norwich is that they earn millions from TV. Advertisers pay for a product that they expect people to watch. Subscribers pay for a product they want to enjoy. These two clubs are failing to provide a spectacle neutrals can enjoy. They are gifted millions by the TV deal, and I believe they have a duty to entertain. Norwich and Stoke, more than any other clubs in the Premier League, are failing to fulfill their obligations. Norwich don’t try to win games. Stoke have a style not fit for the top flight. Should these two clubs really earn millions when they add so little?
Since the Manchester derby a strange group of people have been roaming the British Isles.
They communicate mainly via Twitter and they feed off any crumbs of criticism they can find to attack Sir Alex Ferguson and Manchester United.
They dined out on the controversial red card for Nani that saw United unfairly knocked out of the Champions League.
They got unnaturally excited about the 1-0 defeat at Chelsea in the FA Cup.
These people watched the Manchester derby and concluded Gareth Barry must be better than Michael Carrick.
They’ve even suggested Manchester United are not the best side in the Premier League this season. If you look hard enough on Twitter you’ll find them.
It’s pathetic.
Like Superman couldn’t handle Kryptonite, these strange people can’t handle the truth. It hurts them too much.
Manchester United are miles clear, they’re the best team in the country, and one defeat against the second best team in the country doesn’t change that.
If you base a view of Carrick or Rooney or Ferdinand on one game you’ve either got a grudge, or you’re desperate to prove a point that you know, deep down, isn’t actually true.
These players have been picked regularly by Sir Alex Ferguson for a number of years, a spell that represents the most sustained period of success United have ever had.
Has Fergie been wrong all these years? That’s a bold claim.
The strange group of people desperate to put United down will point at Welbeck and Jones and bleat on about how they’re not good enough, no technique, poor English players.
They’re about to win the title. Easily.
The critics need to shut up, until they’ve got a good point to make.
They’re the kind of people holding English football back and they should be ashamed of themselves.
Strange: Superman couldn't handle Kryptonite... and Manchester United haters can't handle the truth as Sir Alex Ferguson's side lead the way in the title race by 12 points, despite last night's defeat by Man City (below)
